livingtea

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세상과 부딪히고 쓰러뜨려도 내 피를 삼키고 일어나.
- epik high, 혼

1. to ACE this immuno exam.
2. this semester to be done with. weekly midterms for possibly 8 weeks in a row?  NOT TOO COOL universe, not too cool.
3. choi minho/ludwig (lupo) paischer fic. i am a freak i know. but have you SEEN THIS?

(OH GOD WHAT AM I DOING????)

4. crossover fic for pru's asunder/DRP universes--castiel + merlin are in pediatrics! they wear ugly scrubs/are color blind. arthur + dean snarking about their respective partner's bad fashion should ensue.
5. kim yuna to win grand prix.
6. for me to not be sick.

thanks universe!

why yes i do believe i hate myself.

why the fuck can't i stop being such a lazy asshole?

I WANT TO SPAR. I WANT TO MAKE BEAUTIFUL DRAWINGS. I WANT TO WRITE ABOUT FIRST DATES AND IDENTITY AND AWKWARD KISSES AND STORIES. I WANT TO KEEP MY FUCKING 4.0. I WANT TO LOOK INTO A MIRROR AND NOT HATE MYSELF. I WANT TO DO AMAZING RESEARCH.

instead.

i gorge myself on instant noodles. i skip practice. i waste time watching tv. i slack off.

why why why why why

i can't stand it.

why the fuck is it so fucking hard to change.

i hate who i am.

why is it so hard to change?

shit i should have done before summer vacation, during the school year:
1. complete physiology notes: reproductive physiology
2. complete neurobiology notes: lectures 17-20 (basically copy the typed lecture notes into the notebook, with additional info from slides/review packets, maybe do this during breaks at work?)
3. start a math notebook: mv calc notes + practice problems (???????), use the rest for statistics when school starts
4. finish all the chem practice problems (example problems, chapter problems, problem set): chapter 8-15
* (maybe) finish neuroscience notes, ESPECIALLY chapter 7-neuroanatomy oTZ.

shit to do during the summer:
5. start learning orgo from my brother's textbook (MUST GET A HEAD START, WILL KEEP 4.0 EVEN IF IT KILLS ME)

1. email dr. faden about getting my georgetown ID and when i should start, etc... (PRIORITY: 5/25)
2. clean room. (PRIORITY: 5/25-5/26)
3. order organic soap + toothpaste.
4. start running on treadmill.
5. return library books, borrow new books.
6. get replacement charger for my laptop.
7. finish physio notes.
8. make plans for hanging out with friends (IMPORTANT)

1) obligatory freshman year recap.
things that sucked about college

• it was a shitload of work. no hw buffer + lecture based exams = hell x infinity during exam weeks.
• it was very lonely. most of it was my fault, with me being socially inept and very lazy about meeting people, but still. i missed my high school friends a lot.
• my roommate. what a dumb bitch. she sleep-xiled me, sexiled me, caused an ant colony to grow on my side of the room, and NEVER FUCKING CLEANED UP AFTER HERSELF. she left so much shit in the room after she left, which i had to clean up, after an all nighter and a harrowing three hour neurobio exam.stupid spoiled entitled bitch.

things that did not suck about college

• 4.0 GPA HAH. this made things so much better.
• no church. you have no idea how much i loved this. now that i'm back, sundays are forever ruined.
• well david, kelly, christina, and matt turned out to be very friendly and nice despite my pathetic social skills.
• tkd was pretty cool, despite never really feeling at home with the upper belts. also whatever now i can break boards with my feet, which is pretty kick ass.
• my gender and sexuality studies first year seminar was amazing.

2) a slice of noori chai's very dull life.
relaxing. waking up past noon and taking naps whenever. rereading childhood fantasy novels and stephen king novels and shounen manga series. cursing my shitty internet. eating bad chinese food. appeasing my mother's anger at my indolence by whipping out the aforementioned gpa.

3) plans for summer.
health related

• exercise-running every day. must get in shape for tkd.
• lose weight.
• eat healthier.

fandom related

• draw more--i want to draw good fanart, but in order to do so, i must improve. head shots are not enough!
• try writing some fanfics--jenny's shin/sena fic, 2008 olympic choi minho/ludwig (lupo) paischer fic, etc...
• make a nice layout for my livejournal.

school & career related

• work hard and learn a lot at my internship. impress dr. faden. (hm i should email him about starting date/hours.)
• research scholarship opportunities. i'll make it so that mom and dad can afford to close down the shop for a week and visit relatives.
• tutor sam and gideon--SATs and college application help. hopefully i'll earn some money to pay for books and stuff i want (ipod nano and a cheap netbook)
• finish recopying physio notes (reproductive physiology) and neurobio notes (neural circuits and plasticity unit) and mv calc into notebooks.
• start learning organic chemistry and genetics w/ bro's textbooks.